Confused Christian seeking understanding

I'm not a member of New Birth Missionary Baptist Church.

I've never attended the church in Dekalb County, and I've never met its leader - Bishop Eddie Long.

But that doesn't change the fact that as a Christian man, I'm concerned confused over what's happening with at the church and with Bishop Long. Ever since the sexual misconduct allegations started for Bishop Long, he and his church have made headlines here in Atlanta.

Just last week, a story said that Bishop Long's wife, who had filed for divorce, has decided not to leave him. There has been a great deal of back and forth on this issue and the media has reported each decision and each statement that has come out of Long's camp regarding this situation.

But that's not why I'm writing. I'm writing because, believe it or not, my faith is a bit shaken - not in God. No, instead my faith is shaken over church leadership.

After all the news on Bishop Long, which continues to mount every other week, I just don't think that I can blindly trust church leadership anymore. Maybe I never was suppose to. Or maybe, I'm just confused and seeking understanding.

Bishop Eddie Long & Youtube

Last week, Bishop Eddie Long entered the realm of controversy yet again, when the Atlanta Journal Constitution broke a story about him taking part in a religious ceremony that saw the enigmatic figure crowned as some sort of king by a Jewish minister.

The 14-minute long video posted to youtube, drew much criticism from the Jewsish community, and even eventually led to an apology from Bishop Long. It's also leading to an investigatory piece that will be covered by WSBTV in Atlanta later on today around 5 p.m.

What is so interesting about this, is the fact that the News Media continue to build stories off of what happens in the pulpit on Sunday's from this church. They often get their material from youtube postings of the sermons and services.

If you recall, an article discussing World Changer's Pastor Creflo Dollar and his "support" (I'll let you decide if this was such) of Bishop Long, was published in the AJC last year, just based off of a video uploaded to youtube. The video was taken off of youtube shortly after the story was published in the AJC.

What is becoming increasingly apparent, is that pastors no longer have the same impunity to say what they want in the pulpit without facing a significant amount of criticism from the media. It doesn't matter if you find the video offensive or not (many have), the fact is, messages that were once behind closed doors are now being exposed to the world.

I think Chrisitan leaders need to take heed to this, and make sure what they're doing in these times, really lines up with God's message.

Do you have a Good Man?

It always baffles me, whenever I hear conversations from women complaining about their husbands or boyfriends. They seem to be so critical of him - pointing out every flaw he has - from not putting the towel on the towel rack properly, to not taking them out on the date that they would love to have.

As a man, I'm not perfect. In fact the only person that is perfect is Jesus - and even though I strive to be like him, I'm far from him. I think all too often women are looking for that hero that will sweep them off their feet and solve every problem.

But what women aren't looking at is sometimes they have flooded these men with problems and have put them into a position where they're tired of solving every little thing.

But how do you know if you have a good man? Women ask yourself these questions.

• Does he take care of his family?
• Does he combine his income with yours in an open manner to help you both achieve the hopes and dreams that you have as a family?
• Is he a nice person to those around him?
• Does he show an honest interest in your well being?
• If you were hospitalized could you count on him to visit you and take care of the household while you were away?
• Does he have a love for the Lord and share that love with you?
• Is he faithful?

If the answer to most of these questions is yes, and you still don't think you have a good man, then ask yourself... what's wrong with my perception. Why is it that he isn't one in my own eyes. It could be that your own expectations are clouding your judgement.