Hey... you're not Madea. You're actually abusing your child!

     Madea is a fictional character created and portrayed by Tyler Perry in numerous films; television sitcoms and plays.  She's a stern matriarch that commands respect and is not afraid to dole out some tough love or a butt kicking, or a headlock to any disobedient children (or adults for that matter).She has a soft side (which is tough to find) and often imparts knowledge and shows a strong commitment to her family.

     Unfortunately, there are too many moms out there (not all, but some), who are emulating the "tough" aspect of the ficitional Madea's personality, and it comes off as verbal and emotional abuse. We have moms that are cursing their kids out to the point of insanity. When is it ever OK to call your child out of their name?

     I'll never forget the time I heard a woman cursing out her 6-year-old daughter on the train. She called this little girl the B-word. How can there be any hope for any young man to respect this girl, or this girl to be in any healthy relationship when she reaches adulthood, when she can't even get the tenderness and love from the woman who gave birth to her?

    I can remember seeing a woman dog her elementary school age child out in public - and belittle him like he had committed the worst crime in the world - but when she spoke to a guy that was trying to "holla" at her nearly seconds later, she grinned from ear to ear like the Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland. I wonder if she stopped to think about how her son felt when saw a man his mother just met, getting more respect than from her than her own flesh and blood.

    To the moms out there that do this ... you cannot verbally and emotionally abuse your children like this. If you want productive, emotionally stable adults to go out here and make a difference, then check your frustrations at the door when it comes to the treatment of these children. How can we hope to raise the future leaders of this nation, when you are tearing down their foundation before it is even solidified. 

     And this is prevalent in some parts of the black community, and we don't talk about it. Instead we brush it to the side. We ignore it and just chalk it up to saying that mom has had a bad day. We never get to the root of the issue and it boils and festers inside us until we reach adulthood.

     I know children can be frustrating and they can take you through a lot. I know there are times when you want to throw your hands and give up, especially if you're doing it on your own. One small mistake from a child, like spilled punch on the floor, or a disciplinary report from the teacher can bring a parent one step closer to a meltdown. But in the midst of whatever order and chaos comes from this we must not forget that we are these children's protectors. We must never treat them like they are our enemies. They're facing enough in this world already.